The “Princess of Power”

I not only host my own podcast, but I am frequently invited to appear on other shows as well. And I have been on a lot of them. But none quite compared to my most recent appearance on The Wellness Driven Life Show. The host, April Chavez, was not only charming and beautiful, but she was warm and engaging as well. She was also a lot of fun to talk to and we had a great conversation.

Imagine my surprise when she referred to me as “the real Princess of Power.” I didn’t even know there was such a thing until I looked it up. Apparently it’s an animated story about an orphaned princess who discovered a magic sword which transforms her into a legendary warrior princess. Who knew?

Anyway, we had a great time together, and I thought you might find it interesting to hear me on the other side of the microphone as a podcast guest instead of a host for a change. So, here is the link to the episode along with a graphic April used to promote the episode. April produces a fabulous show with high quality guests, and I’m not saying that just because I was one of them.

Check it out: The Real Princess of Power

https://www.ctrmedianetwork.com/show/the-wellness-driven-life-show/an-interview-w-the-real-princess-of-power-cheryl-ilov-on-health-healing-martial-arts/

Strength, Power, & Flexibility

Everyone has the right to defend themselves. But you can’t defend yourself if you don’t have the skills you need to protect yourself. Learning the appropriate skills does take time, practice, and commitment. Lots of time and commitment, so much that it can be overwhelming. I get that. Been there, done that.

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How A Middle-Aged Princess Became a Warrior Queen

As you probably know by now, The FemiNinja Project is the brain child of Yours Truly. However, what you might not know is that the show is loosely based on my experience as a martial artist. Which is why the focus is on personal empowerment, overcoming obstacles, restoring human dignity and lots of other fun stuff.

Another little tidbit you might not know about me is that I am also an author. My first book is about fitness over fifty and titled “Forever Fit and Flexible: Feeling Fabulous at Fifty and Beyond.” It was published in 2016, and I suppose the title is self explanatory. My second book was released last year in March, 2023 and titled: The Reluctant Ninja: How A Middle-Aged Princess Became A Warrior Queen.”

Immediately after the book was published I suffered a terrible case of writer’s remorse. I’m not even sure if there is such a thing or if I made it up, but I had three really tough weeks. Which means I totally freaked out. There was no way I could get that genie back in the bottle.

The book chronicles my how (and why), I began my journey in the strange new world of men and martial arts at the tender young age of 47, and includes very personal information. Yikes! Eventually I got over it and assured myself that it would be okay, as long as only strangers read it. The following day I walked into the dojo and saw a copy on my Sensei’s desk. Major freak out.

That was a year ago, and he’s still talking to me, so I guess it turned out okay. In the meantime, the book earned two awards and made #1 Amazon Best Seller. Not bad for a middle-aged princess!

Episode #234: Healthy Relationships and the Power of “No” with Alex Avila

Podcast: Download (Duration: 52:40 — 48.2MB)

Alex Avila is an author, speaker, counselor, founder and owner of the Relationship Institute of the Rockies who is passionate about helping others build healthy relationships. 

Alex counsels individuals and couples, has published 3 books and developed an online course, all of which focus on helping people grow and nurture emotionally healthy relationships. He is also a renowned speaker who creates effective and meaningful presentations for a variety of audiences regarding relationships, mental health, emotional safety, and more.  

In this gentle and informative episode, Alex shares many pearls of wisdom regarding boundaries, relationships, intimacy, infidelity, betrayal, non-verbal behaviors and communication, and the power of saying “NO.” There is so much information in this episode that you will want to share it with your friends and family, and listen to it over and over again.   

https://www.alexaavila.com https://www.instagram.com/alex.avila.official/ https://www.youtube.com/c/AlexAvilaCounselor

The Power of Shame

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Ahhh, the power of shame. This is a subject covered in Episode #165 with mental health professional Katie Gilbertson. It’s an important topic, because the power of shame is something most of us are all too familiar with. But shame can wreak havoc on our self-esteem, and ruin our relationships. Especially the most important and valuable relationship we have in all the world, which is the relationship with ourselves.

Our self-image, self-confidence, and personal power is slowly chipped away every time we feel shame. I call it “chronic shame syndrome.” Because every time we feel ashamed of ourselves, our brain registers it deep in the recesses of our neural circuits. The circuits are reinforced, making them stronger with each message of shame it receives. Eventually, shame is the only thing we know, and it can permeate every aspect of our lives. And not in a good way.

However, there’s a glimmer of hope, even if you are wallowing in chronic shame syndrome. Simply turn the script around. Each time that pesky shame monster rears its ugly head, give it a clear and powerful message that it is not welcome. Remind yourself that you are worthy of respect, civility, courtesy, and appreciation. Those neural circuits will get the message, and with time will reverse the belief system that you deserve to live under the mantle of shame, and shame will no longer have power over you. And isn’t that a much better way to live?

 

For The Love of Dog

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I love dogs, and I have loved them from the moment I was born, maybe even sooner. I know, it sounds rather melodramatic, but it isn’t. It’s the God’s truth.

A lot of people don’t feel the same way. My recent interview with Pat Buttitta is an example of how some people might feel about dogs. For over 25 years Pat had an irrational fear of dogs which bordered on terror. However, once he faced his fears, his life changed dramatically, even propelling him into a new and satisfying career as a dog trainer.

Pat doesn’t train dogs. He trains people. Because most of the problems people have with their dogs is the fault of the owner, not the dog. Dogs simply react to the conditions of their environment. Our job is to make that environment as user friendly as possible for one of the greatest gifts God gave us.

As Pat so eloquently says it, dog is God spelled backwards. And I couldn’t agree more, could you?

Let Your Dreams Be Your Guide

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What are your dreams, and with whom do you share them? Do you keep them to yourself for self-reflection and contemplation, or do you hold them close to your heart? Or, are you someone who doesn’t remember your dreams?

I come from a tribe who have very vivid dreams and share them freely with each other. Or at least we used to when we were younger and spent so much time together. I grew up in a house with 4 sisters, 2 bedrooms, and 1 bathroom, so privacy itself was a dream. I never had my own room until I was 21 and a senior in college. That, my friends, was a dream come true!

But until that time, we shared everything, including our dreams. We even tried to analyze what they might mean, although some were pretty easy to figure out. Like the dream my mother had when my grandmother died, ten years after my grandfather did. She dreamed that she was alone on the property where her childhood home stood, and where she was born. The house was gone. Vanished. All that was left of the site was dirt. She wandered alone over the mounds of dirt, desperately looking for her parents as well as her childhood friends.

My mom woke up with a heavy heart, and she told me about it when I called her a few days later, as I was safely ensconced in my own apartment. Which also included my own room, my own closet, and my own bathroom. “Oh, Mum,” can’t you see what that symbolizes?” Mom replied, “I never thought of it that way.”

Dreams give us a way to process our feelings, emotions, fears, desires, and so much more. Hmm, perhaps we should pay closer attention to them. Sweet dreams.

A Renaissance Woman

I have been musing over my recent podcast episode with the amazing Joy Johnson titled Bold, Brash, and Beautiful. Although I have “known” Joy for several years, I really didn’t get to know her until we had a vibrant conversation during her interview. Joy was full of surprises. She even left me speechless, which has only happened a handful of times in my lifetime.

For example, Joy explains that she had a fascination with engines at a very young age, and began tinkering with them. She discovered that she was a mathematical genius in high school. Who knew? She has a self-proclaimed violent streak. I would like to dispute that last point, since she used that “violence” to protect her younger siblings, as well as other kids who couldn’t protect themselves. I call her a mama bear. Or a warrior.

Regardless of how you label it, this passion for protecting those who can’t protect themselves led her to pursue training in Krav Maga. If you aren’t familiar with Krav Maga, it is totally bad-ass fighting system, which Joy now shares with other women through her self-defense classes.

She earned a degree in engineering from The Colorado School of Mines, and then decided it was time to tap into her feminine side. So, she began pole dancing. She loved the strength and power of pole, as well as the sexy side of the sport. She became so passionate about it that she enrolled in the teacher training program at a lovely studio called Studio 3sixT.

Joy shares her passion with the many women she teaches and is a role model and inspiration for all of them, including me. The definition of a Renaissance woman is one who is a highly cultivated. One who is skilled and well-versed in many fields of knowledge. You might call Joy a Renaissance woman. But I call her a warrior.

Slow Down, and Proceed With Caution

Predators are everywhere, and they come in a variety of different forms. But they all have one thing in common. They are looking for an easy target. That’s why it is so important to pay attention, stay alert, slow down, and proceed with caution whenever you are presented with a situation that just doesn’t feel right.

Which is really important to keep in mind at all times. I don’t mean you should be over vigilant, just stay alert, and aware. It’s especially important right now as we are recovering (hopefully), from the pandemic. There are a lot of scams out there, and the bag guys are playing to our weaknesses, and profiting from our “pain points.”

For example, just a few days ago my husband and I received a notice in the mail. It was from the government (yeah, right), and appeared very official and legitimate. So, I opened it. Inside was a prepaid debit card for the two of us to use in the amount of $1,200. Nice! All I had to do was sign the back of the card, and call a phone number to activate the card. Easy enough.

I handed it to my husband, who was sitting next to me at the kitchen table. For some reason we seem to be spending a lot of time together these past few months. He looked at it and said, “Oh, wow! Nice!” I smiled at him and said, “It’s a scam.” He replied, “How do you know?” “Because they got your name wrong.”

When we got married, I kept my maiden name. The letter and the debit card had my uncle’s name on it, who unfortunately passed away last summer. My husband didn’t even notice until I pointed it out. Slow down and proceed with caution. Stay safe!

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